Stepdad hides 17-year-old stepdaughter's passport to exclude her from family trip, wife discovers truth and loses it: 'I screamed my head off at him then canceled the whole trip'

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    na INTL JC-AOI WED 03 FEB 2016 Confirmat elicker GATE PASSPORT SEAT 16A
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    My husband and I have been together for 3 years. He has 3 kids from his previous relationship and I have one. She's the oldest (17). He's a dedicated man, puts first and loves everyone.
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    My husband always complains that my daughter doesn't spend time with her stepsiblings or him but she has reasons for that and that is school, health issues and work. She does her best
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    to spend as much time with them as she can. but she on the other hand complains that her stepdad tells her to basically take on the role of a babysitter whenever she's with her stepsiblings. My husband denied that and said that my daughter was making up excuses to not have to spend time with his kids.
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    For this issue, I figured that a family trip is what the family need to get together and spend more time around each others. My husband liked the idea but said that his kids are now "uncomfortable" around my daughter because of her "attitude" and suggested we let her stay home and have the house all to herself since that's "what she always wanted". I told him it's best that we all go. he kept complaing til I snapped and told him to stop
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    I booked (paid) for the whole family. However, my daughter told me she couldn't find her passport.
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    We turned the house upside down looking for it but couldn't find it. My husband said maybe it was a sign from that we should let her stay home so the trip wouldn't turn into a disaster. I ignored his comment but later while I was cleaning his office I found the passport, tucked away in the 3rd drawer under a ton of papers. I was floored by this, I confronted
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    him with it and he swore he had no idea why or how the passport got there. I checked the upstairs camera and saw him enter my daughter's room. That was it for me, I screamed my head off at him then cancelled the whole trip
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    completely. He started arguing saying I overreacted and that he didn't want his kids to be "miserable" on the trip and that willing to apologize to my daughter if and when I reconsider my decision regarding the cancellation of the trip, because my stepkids will be devastated but I said it was final and that it was done.
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    He become cold and distant and said that he wants to take some time to do some fasting and get guidance from about how he should deal with the disrespect and control I had displayed lately. AITA for cancelling it altogether?
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    AbbyBirb ΝΤΑ He can't use your daughter as free child-care for his children... so he intentionally alienates her from his family (and yes, I said his family because it is very apparent he does not consider your family his family!)
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    Let's see what he's done just in your post alone... • Your, almost adult, daughter has valid reasons why she cannot spend more time, as he wants, with the step siblings... he does not think her needs are equal or even important.
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    Your husband orders her to babysit. She is not now nor will ever be his beck-and-call servant.
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    • You wanted (booked and paid for yourself) a family vacation... he does not see her as family, since he made excuses and complained that she could not go against your wishes. He does not think she deserves to go on the "family" vacation because he clearly does not see her as his family.
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    • When he could not manipulate you into what he wanted, he forced the issue himself... then allowed you to tear thru the house causing you and your daughter stress while knowing 100% what he did caused this... and had no problem with that.
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    • He used "GC Will" as the excuse for something he intentionally did... does he think he's a conduit for or himself? (Narcissistic much?)
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    • He lied about what he did, and when you called him out, he still continued to lie to you... and when you had proof and he ran out of valid lies... he twisted it all around saying that you are the one overreacting!
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    • When he still couldn't lie, argue, or manipulate what he wanted from you... he then turned to giving you the cold shoulder as a form of punishment to you. (oh you've hurt my little feelings! you must adjust your ways to make me feel better!! ... even though this is all my fault and my own doing, but I cannot be held responsible for that!!!)
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    Your husband wants to control you; what you do & what you want. Your husband wants to control your daughter; what she should be spending her time on and forcing her to do things she cannot do.
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    When he cannot easily do that, he uses manipulation and lying in order to accomplish it. When he is then held responsible for his actions, he turns it around on you. When that doesn't work, he throws a temper tantrum.
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    He did not marry you because he wanted a wife and step-daughter; he was looking for 2 females to boss around and do his bidding... in Gname, Amen!

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